For the last 5 or so years, it seems as though more people are waving their introvert flags with pride. But sometimes, it seems that what those “introverts” are really talking about is being shy. I regularly see the two words used interchangeably, but they aren’t really the same thing. Of course some people may be shy AND introverted, the two do not necessarily go hand in hand. There are some similarities, but there are differences, too.
Shyness
The Merriam Webster kid definition of shyness is my favorite. It defines shy as “not feeling comfortable around people : not wanting or able to call attention to oneself.” Shy people tend to feel anxious around others. They might also exhibit behaviors like avoiding eye contact, not speaking up in a group, or even avoiding social situations. Shyness can also be situational. Being shy has more to do with how the person is feeling as opposed to being a personality trait.
Introversion
Introversion, on the other hand, is more of a personality trait. It exists on a spectrum, but it is not likely to be situational. Merriam-Webster defines introversion as “a personality trait or style characterized by a preference for or orientation to one’s own thoughts and feelings.” This definition, as well as others related to personality, makes it clear that introversion is a preference regarding the internal vs. external world. A shy person may be an introvert, but the terms are not interchangeable.
Similarities and Differences
Both shy and introverted people may prefer to be alone. They are both also likely to find social situations draining. However, the reasons behind the preference for solitude and social interactions are probably different.
For example, shy people might avoid social interactions entirely, whereas introverts may just prefer a small group of close friends or family. Introverts may not avoid social situations, but they may need more alone time after spending time with people. They will need this time to process their thoughts and recharge their energy.
Are You Shy or Introverted?
It is actually possible that you are both shy AND introverted. I definitely define myself as a shy introvert. When I am in social situations that are unfamiliar to me or with new people, it is difficult for me to speak up. I am hesitant to call too much attention to myself until I get to know people better. At the same time, I find it tiring to spend a lot of time with a group of people even when I’m not feeling shy. Even when I’m having a good time, I need plenty of solitary time after a gathering.
It is equally possible that you can be an introvert and not be shy. You may love talking with people and having deep conversations. Just because you need alone time after being with people does not mean that you feel anxious or uncertain about interacting.
Final Thoughts on Being Shy or Introverted
While there may be similarities between shyness and introversion, they are two separate concepts. Shy and introverted people might all prefer to be alone or find social situations tiring. However, shyness usually manifests as feeling anxious, nervous or awkward around others. Introversion is a personality trait related to a person’s preference for solitude and time alone to recharge. It is possible to be shy and introverted, but it is equally possible to be one or the other. These differences can help you understand yourself better and aid you in your interactions with others.
